or as I like to say, “No one can make you feel stupid without your permission.” However you would like to say it this quote has been coined by Eleanor Roosevelt and it is a very sage ideology. Building on the ideology we can go even further to state that no one can make you feel anything without your permission.
We humans are very emotional creatures and the more emotionally intelligent we are the better chance we have at success (however you may define it). On our path to becoming emotionally intelligent we will realize that we are solely in control of our emotions. Someone does not make you mad. Someone does something and you respond by becoming mad. Someone does not make you feel embarrassed. You allow someone to make you feel embarrassed.
I know this is blunt. I promise you I am telling the truth. The quicker you accept it the easier it will be. It is actually very freeing and will help you take more control. This works on the opposite end as well. If someone insists that you “made” then do something or you “make me this way.” Nope, they are in control of their own emotions and you did not make them do anything.
Throughout our lives we are going to meet people are going to make mistakes and sometimes be vindictive or do mean things. Obviously we are not robots and will feel emotions. It is how we control those emotions that count. Sometimes it is not worth giving someone the satisfaction. This includes people in our past who have hurt us. I know first hand that being cheated on or someone taking advantage of your trust can hurt so bad physical pain arises. It sucks. However, it is no reason to keep animosity and let that person control your emotions when a better person comes along.
**Real life story time** Standing on the train platform he said he was surprised I was not embarrassed by his outfit. I admit it was a goofy and attention drawing – not my style as I like to stay under the radar. I responded that I was surprised he thought he had clout to influence my emotions.
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