The “can’t dos” are those who will tell you you cannot do something. It’s obnoxious. I’ll never forget the troll who told me I couldn’t get the salary I wanted. The memory of him telling me I needed to lower my standards will stick with me for my life. He is not dominate or any part of the memory, the strength I had is. Standing in my kitchen, as a guest, in my home, he stood there telling me he didn’t mean to offend me. Telling me it is going to be difficult and it is best I lower my standards, telling me I was being unrealistic. At one point in my life I maybe would have believed him. I would have lowered my standards and thought his backwards observation was right. This time I did not. I kept going. I got more than I was asking for.

*Did I mention that with the salary I was asking I would make more than him? Yeah, he actually said that.*

In life you will have dreams and ambitions and there will always be the naysayers who will tell you you cannot do it. Tell you you cannot make it and will try to stop you from trying. Why do people do this? Who knows. Let us not waste too much time thinking of them. It could be for many reasons. Let’s go with the most kind hearted, let us assume they are a nice person and they have our best interests at heart and they do not want us to see our dreams get crushed so they give us their earnest advice to spare us from heartbreak. Now let us go with the most realistic, people are jerks sometimes and they are jealous and do not want to see other succeed. Maybe once upon a time they were an inspiring artist and their work did not get recognized so they are living in their bitterness wanting to invite you to join them.

What can we do? We can have confidence and faith in ourselves and we can make the can’t dos move on over. We can ask them. Why would you say I can’t do it? Why wouldn’t you just support me? I understand you want the best for me, shouldn’t I make my own mistakes? Isn’t it better that I try? If you are not causing physical, irreparable hard to yourself or another then they should not be concerned.
**real life story time** that dude I mentioned in the beginning of the post. The one who told me I needed to lower my standards. I did not listen and I tenaciously looked for what I thought I rightfully deserved. I eventually received an offer for a position with a higher salary than I was asking for. It has been a little over a year and I was promoted last week. I do not know where that dude is. Honestly, I don’t care.

imagine credit: website

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